JASON BOURNE: SPOILER-FREE REVIEW:

The world is on the brink of turmoil, there are riots on the street, paranoia is at an all-time high, and shady government agencies are breeding a new group of spies and assassins capable of infiltrating the very heart of our society. In times like these, there is only one person we can turn to:

That’s right, Matt Damon. 

Set twelve years after the events of The Bourne Ultimatum, amnesiac super-spy Jason Bourne has resurfaced with his memory fully intact and hellbent on uncovering the hidden truth about his family and his past. With some returning faces including Julia Stiles and a new stellar supporting cast that features Vincent Cassel, Alicia Vikander and veteran Tommy Lee Jones the real question is, with the return of Damon and Paul Greengrass in the directors chair, is this sequel necessary let alone worth the agonising wait? 

In a post-Snowden world the Bourne franchise hasn’t lost any of its steam, it keeps the film contemporary and just adds to our global-paranoia of what personal information we should and shouldn’t be putting on the internet. With a fast pace throughout, thanks to Greengrass’ signature frenetic camerawork and editing, we move from foot chases to motorcycle chases to internet chases to Bourne bringing a paperclip to a gun fight and still winning - it’s a lot of what we’ve come to expect from this series. Even though some might complain about Greengrass’ approach to storytelling, you can’t denying that he’s good at giving us a sense of location before the action starts and then pulls the editing together so tightly that you don’t know your earhole from your a**hole as you try to figure out just how Bourne is going to get out of each nail-biting situation. 

The casting is rock-solid with Vikander being a great addition to the series that leaves you constantly questioning which side she’s really on whilst Tommy Lee Jones joins a long line of grumpy old men pulling the strings behind the scenes. Vincent Cassell is the smooth European assassin for this instalment and some of the best scenes are of him effortlessly collecting weapons, data and ass-whoppings. Both Cassell and Jones inclusion add a personal element to Bourne’s mission this time and it’s the most obvious progression for the series to take however taking a step back, it doesn’t really feel like any of these personal moments or vendettas are really earned because the film moves at such a break-neck speed. Often the personal motivations are more of a convenience than anything else, but this isn’t to say that the film isn’t still exciting.  

Truth be told, I’m a massive Bourne fan. Ever since Doug Liman gave us the first instalment with The Bourne Identity, this series redefined the Spy-Thriller genre and even had cinematic staples like James Bond mimicking what Damon and Greengrass brought to the table. The shaky-cam may be a little nauseating at times, but there is no denying that these films keep you on your feet and has the most lethal array of stationary ever committed to cinema. I even enjoyed the Jeremy Renner film, it had potential and it did a half-way decent job of world-building, but I understand why they wouldn’t continue that storyline when they can get Matt Damon and Paul Greengrass back together again. 

Much like the Bond series, the Bourne films have become a bit of a slave to their own formula: discover a new ominously titled maguffin, evade capture in a densely populated location, have a hand-to-hand fight with a supposed ally (whilst incorporating some form of office stationary in the fight), have a face-to-face with the old grizzled bad-guy, end on a car chase that out does the previous films (and this film definitely has the best car chase of the franchise). It’s just unfortunate that after a nine year break, Damon and Greengrass hasn’t brought anything new to their template. If you’re a fan of the series, like myself, this is probably not going to bother you too much, but with another Bourne movie set-up at the end of this film, you’ve got to hope that they will add a little something different to ensure this series longevity. 

Jason Bourne gets Four out of Five Stars (or Four out of Five ass-whooping paperclips to the face.)     

STAR TREK BEYOND: SPOILER-FREE REVIEW:

In the third instalment of the newly rebooted series, we sees Kirk dealing with daddy issues, Spock being logical, Bones being grumpy and Scotty being Scottish. In-between all this we have a movie that feels very much like an episode from the original 60’s series but just amped up to blockbuster level that manages to be one part clever, one part funny, one part action-packed and all Star Trek. 

Three years in to their five year mission to explore strange new worlds and Chris Pine’s Captain Kirk is having that classic first world problem of being bored at his job. He’s stopped bedding aliens, he can’t decide to whether to wear the yellow commander’s shirt or the other yellow commander’s shirt, and he’s come to the realisation that he’s a year older than his father ever lived to be. Oh yeah, this sounds like the kind of excitement you’ve come to expect from this reenergised franchise. Thankfully though Kirk’s mundane existence is about to be shaken up by Idris Elba bringing a swarming sh*t-storm of f*ckery   upon Kirk and the crew of the USS Enterprise.

Those worried that J.J. Abrams space-jumping from the series would have an adverse effect on the quality of the film can rest easy as Justin Lin, the man most famous for giving us no less than four of the Fast & Furious films, takes the helm and gives us, a surprisingly solid Star Trek film. He’s managed to honour the original Trek series whilst still giving us that kinetic action that we come to expect from the two previous instalments - even if it is a little subdued in direct comparison. Lin does brings his Fast & Furious eye to film the USS Enterprise flying in ways you’ve never seen before, with cinematography that sweeps through ships and gives you more than one moment of vertigo. 

On top of this, the designs are all kicked up a notch in every aspect; from new uniforms to the new aliens, from spaceships to planets to planets that house spaceships; it really is some impressive Sci-Fi. One thing that both writer Simon Pegg and director Justin Lin should be credited for is giving us an exciting Star Trek film that’s true to the heart of the original series and manages to avoid some of the familiar beats that plagued the last two films: there’s no Red Bull Space-Jumping, no one getting promoted due to just being in the room at the time, no Kirk getting chewed out for being reckless and virtually no lens flares. Beyond does use another Beastie Boys track, but in the best possible way. The film also handles the deaths of both Leonard Nimoy and Anton Yelchin in a dignified way, plus introduces the franchises first ever gay character in a manner where it doesn’t feel like tokenism, nor is it the singular trait that defines the character.  

We have the world’s leading bad-ass Idris Elba in a role where he is completely unrecognisable bar his unique gravelly voice but is never-the-less a sh*t-ton of awesome. He does suffer from bad-guy-exposition-syndrome which does kind of feel a little bit lazy but in the same breath is probably just paying homage to the villains of the original TV series. I mean, there is no legitimate reason for Lieutenant Uhura to be walking around with him whilst he explains his masterplan other than to further the plot. There is also the occasional plot hole, however all of this is forgiven thanks to the inclusion of Sofia Boutella playing a new kick-ass alien warrior by the name of Jaylah, not to be confused with J-Law. 

Overall, the quality of this Star Trek series has remained consistent over the last three films. I wouldn’t say that they have gotten better as they have gone along, they’ve just remained consistent - but when the 2009 reboot set the standard so high that’s nothing to acid-snot sneeze at (don’t worry, I promise that will totally make sense when you see the film.)  

Star Trek Beyond gets Four out of Five Stars (or Four out of Five swarming sh*t-storms of f*ckery) 

GHOSTBUSTERS (2016): SPOILER-FREE REVIEW:

It’s the film that, as soon as it was announced, has ridden a wave of hatred from middle-aged white men on Reddit, 4Chan and the Youtube comment section claiming that this movie would ruin the original Ghostbuster films. It seems many of these guys seem to forget just how bad Ghostbusters 2 really was, but at the end of the day, is Paul Feig’s Ghostbusters reboot really worth all the hate? 

If you can just put nostalgia aside and accept this film for what it is, you might actually have some fun. The humour is strong with some solidly funny banter between characters, there's some well done jump-scares, there’s some good character designs, but most of all, it’s just fun. If you can't put nostalgia aside, then it's not as good as the original, but at least it's better than Ghostbusters II.

Borrowing beats from the original film and modernising them, this new version of the Ghostbusters also wears it's love of the original on its sleeve wholeheartedly. You have some great performances from the whole cast with Kate McKinnon and Chris Hemsworth being the real standouts. She keeps the weird dialed up to 11 throughout the entire runtime whilst Hemsworth just brings the funny in every scene he's in. What's extra pleasing is that, much like Rose Byrne in Bad Neighbors, he was able to use his Australian accent which is great to see in an American film and easily helped to sell his humour even more-so. 

The humour itself is consistently strong throughout, although those expecting Bridesmaids-level swearing and lewdness may want to temper their expectations due to the PG rating. And before people get up in arms over that, even if the film had been cast with Seth Rogen, James Franco, Jonah Hill and Craig Robinson you still would have had the humour pulled back down to PG-friendly territory, however there are still a few naughty jokes that managed to slip past the censors. 

The film isn't without its faults though, the villain is really not needed but is also irritatingly bad on a level the wreaks of pantomime. The bad guy literally walks around talking out loud to no one in particular basically explaining his motivations to the audience every time he's on screen - and it’s cliched, really really cliched. The final act also suffers from some poor plotting that I feel is really endemic of Sony's approach to storytelling. Without giving too much away: one of the team is taken away in front of the other members of the team, they know who has taken them and what they plan to do but don't appear to do anything about this until the apocalypse arrives, it just doesn't make sense.

So, a lot of the hate comes down to the fact that this film is a reboot, and to be honest, it took me many years to make my peace with reboots and remakes. There is naturally a cynical side to reboots and remakes in the sense that they are easier to market and a safer financial bet due to there already being an in-built audience, but there is another reason that reboots exist: to keep these stories in popular culture and relevant. As hard as it might be to believe, kids today don’t know who Indiana Jones is, or what The Goonies are, or what Back To The Future is, and until The Force Awakens came out, many of them had never even seen Star Wars - trust me, I’ve taught kids for the last decade. So reboots are there to keep these stories in the public conscious. Once again, it might be really hard for white males between the age of 35-45 to believe, but these films are not made for them and the release of a new interpretation of their favourite film has no impact on the original because the original still exists for them to watch. 

Just on a side note though, if you are one of those winging man-babies that claim to be a film reviewer yet are refusing to review this film, then you are really sh*t at your job and you’re not a f*cking film critic in my eyes. 

Overall, the film is fun and is in no danger of destroying anyone's childhood, but we do need to keep in mind when saying that that man-babies think differently to you and I. As far as modern updates go, it has more hits than misses but the film will definitely leave you wanting to see more of these characters once the credits roll. Whilst talking about the end credits, the new version of the classic Ghostbusters tune may suck, but stay for Chris Hemsworth's dance routine.

Ghostbusters gets Three and a Half out of Five Stars (or Three and a Half out of Five middle-aged white guys missing out on all the fun - but that's what YouTube comments are for am I right?) 

INDEPENDENCE DAY RESURGENCE: SPOILER-FREE REVIEW:

Twenty years ago, Roland Emmerich set the standard for extinction level event blockbusters, since then he has made one disaster movie after another (some figuratively, some literally.) Despite some of his films being turned into sequels, Emmerich himself has never done a sequel before, until now. After sitting through the two hour run-time, you kind of think he should have just continue to stay away from sequels. 

Twenty years after aliens attacked, Will Smith became a huge star, and Jeff Goldblum smirked and stuttered his way through the film; the aliens are back and as the tagline says “we had twenty years to prepare, but so did they” if only the filmmakers had prepared themselves like the aliens. 

Now I remember loving the original when it came out, when I was sixteen, but as I grew up I realised just how terrible the film actually was: cliched scenes, an overabundance of characters, and explosions that would give Michael Bay nocturnal emissions. Twenty years later, and not much has really changed with this “franchise”: too many characters, too many incestuous links between the characters, and gigantic explosive spectacle where characters survive insurmountable odds to eye-rolling proportions. 

The film itself doesn't just one-up its’ predecessor but one-up all the other destructive blockbusters that have come since; Roland Emmerich decides to throw as many landmarks as possible at other landmarks regardless of physics or geography. However physic defying logic is the furthest issue this film has, with lacklustre characters that make you miss Will Smith, and situations that defy sheer logic. Logic such as allowing a long-haired crazy comatose patient who walks effortlessly past armed guards in a secure area that’s housing the President of the United States whilst his IV bags drag along beside him - you know, that kind of logic. 

Once again, like the original, the film is just filled with stereotypes that sometimes border on the offensive. You have the geek, the top-gun maverick, the eccentric scientist, the machete-wielding Somalian warlord, the asian (for the Chinese market), the Jew and quite literally an irishman hunting for gold. Add to this too many additional characters, too long a runtime and too many pixels flying around the screen you can’t help but feel exhausted by the time the end credits start to roll. 

Overall, the film certainly does go bigger than the original and bigger than almost all other disaster movies, but that does not mean better in this case. Lacking on many fronts and in a blockbuster season filled with sequels, Independence Day Resurgence falls into the category of sequels that crashed and burned like many of the landmarks featured in the trailers.

Independence Day Resurgence gets One and a Half Stars out of Five (or One and a Half offensive stereotypes away from a perfect dozen) 

ME BEFORE YOU: SPOILER-FREE REVIEW:

"There was no car chases, not one gun-fight, and no f*cking explosions!" That's what most men who have been dragged to see Me Before You will be thinking when they leave the cinema; but if they can just pull their heads out of their asses for just a minute they might find a film that's funny, witty, sad and for the most part, will leave you with a smile. 

Me Before You sees the Mother Of Dragons become an in-house carer for Tywin Lannister's quadriplegic son (full disclosure, this is not the type of film I usually watch so it's more enjoyable when I imagine that they're playing the characters they're better known for.) So Danerys is providing at home care for that smarmy guy from The Hunger Games, and as their trust between one another grows, so does the divide between Kahlessi and her boyfriend in the film Neville Longbottom from the Harry Potter series. But the big question is, "do the FBI know that the CIA are setting them up?"

In all seriousness, this is quite a good film. It's filled with humour and inevitable heartache that manages to treat the subject of disability with dignity, although the overarching message coming from the quadriplegic character may be viewed as insensitive towards people in the same situation. Putting this aside though, and I hope I’m not sounding too xenophobic here, but I feel many of the positive elements of this movie is due to the fact that it is a British film. The movie has British humour and British sensibilities that makes it less cringeworthy than how an American cast and crew may have handled the same subject by avoiding the need to over-dramatise situations in favour of more relatable human moments. 

Emilia Clarke shows some range in her role here and after failing to win people over as Sarah Connor in last year's Terminator Genesys, she may have found a sweet spot in cinema post-Game Of Thrones in Romantic Dramas for the next decade or so. You have every cast member acting the sh*t out of their roles and the film manages to avoid the groaning cliches almost up until the end. As we hit the final act of the film we begin getting hit with a higher frequency of cliched dialogue, but of course as we enter the final act the sniffle ratio in the cinema will dramatically increase, so be sure to bring your tissues - unless you're like me, and are dead inside. 

Ultimately, it's an enjoyable movie with a bittersweet ending that is passable counter-programming to the Summer blockbusters of the season. Sure the films problems probably would have been resolved if Clarke had three dragons but if it's a tear-jerker that you're looking for then jerk no further than Me Before You.

Me Before You gets three and a half soggy soggy snot-filled tissues.  

HUNT FOR THE WILDERPEOPLE: SPOILER-FREE REVIEW:

It's the best New Zealand export since Flight Of The Concords and it's an even better commercial for the island of the long white cloud than Lord Of The Rings ever was. Hunt For The Wilderpeople just may be the best film of the year and it's earned that title by just making you feel... everything. 

Meet Ricky Baker, he’s a bad egg, we’re talking disobedience, stealing, spitting, running away, throwing rocks, kicking stuff, loitering, and graffitiing. The thing is despite all this, he's just the most likeable kid thanks to the talent of New Zealand actor Julian Dennison. When Ricky runs away from home and in the process gets lost in the forest with his foster father Uncle Hec, the two become infamous fugitives when the public just assume the worst about an old man and a young boy. Along their journey they meet all different sorts of uniquely eccentric New Zealanders which makes for an incredibly enjoyable hour and forty minutes. 

Now this may seem like a simple story, but what makes this so good is all the emotional layers that are filled throughout every element of the film. When you break it down it’s a story about outcasts trying to find their place in the world and that yearning for belonging is just done in a way that is so relatable and meaningful. And throughout all of these meaningful moments, you will find yourself smiling the whole way through, except when you’re laughing, or crying, which happens a lot in this film. 

Director Taika Waititi, who brought us other great films such as What We Do In The Shadows and Boy keeps the cinematography and editing energetic in the same way Edgar Wright approaches his film, but Waititi knows when to restrain it to let us breath in the emotions of a moment. Whether it be something a character has said or an embrace that two characters may share, Taika Waititi knows how to deliver the comedy, but still remembers the heart. 

Of course directing aside, it’s the talent of everyone on screen no matter how big or small their role may be that keeps this film constantly entertaining. Whether your heart is breaking for Sam Neill’s Uncle Hec or your splitting your sides with Rhys Darby’s Psycho Sam the whole film hinges and succeeds on the talents of Julian Dennison who can draw you in with his charm but at every turn just nails each moment with simple mannerisms or just genuine reactions to situation and circumstances. 

Overall, Hunt For The Wilderpeople is one of the best films of the year because it really has everything: it will make you laugh, a lot, it will make you cry, more than once, and from start to finish, you will not be able to wipe the smile off your face (except when you’re crying.)

Hunt For The Wilderpeople gets Four and Three Quarter Stars out of Five (or Four and Three Quarter emotional funny bones constantly slugging you in the feels)