BIG HERO 6: SPOILER-FREE MINI-REVIEW:

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After nearly two decades, Disney has finally emerged from the big shadow that had been cast over them by Pixar, thanks to the combination of Wreck-It Ralph, Frozen and now Big Hero 6.

Loosely based on a short-lived Marvel comic book series of the same name, the film centers on technological wizz-kid Hiro (voiced by Ryan Potter) who through classic-Disney tragedy is befriended by his older brothers advanced medical-nurse robot Baymax (voiced by 30 Rock’s Scott Adsit.) When Hiro’s new invention is stolen by a masked mystery man and used to steal various things in the awesome city of San Fransokyo, both Hiro and Baymax, along with some other colourful characters form their own high-tech superhero team.

Now first off before anything else, Baymax is just the most perfect Disney creation to date. He’s a wonderfully warm Michelin-Man that will melt hearts, make you laugh, make you cry and make you want to buy your own Baymax action figure and ignore the judgmental stares of other adults disgusted at the sight of a fully-grown adult buying a children’s toy for themselves. That crying part by the way, is true. I shed tears, 35-year-old man tears during this film.   

Where Frozen was aimed squarely at young girls, Big Hero 6 firmly sets its sight on the young male viewer: Cool future inventions, techno-babble and not a single musical number from a character in the film.  Disney has managed to capture that childhood wonder for the modern generation of children and young adults. The film is good humoured, well designed and has some fun adventure sequences that really take you back to the first time you saw great kids films like E.T. and The Goonies.

The best part about this film is the fact that Disney have finally found the ability to make modern comedy that isn’t cringe-worthy, and this has been demonstrated in Frozen and Wreck-It Ralph before it so here’s hoping Disney can continue on this path. There are some other great aspects to the film such as the score. Henry Jackman, the man who breathed new life into the Captain America theme in The Winter Soldier, provides a heroic soundtrack that even has elements of other classics like Back to the Future. Jackman is sure to be the go-to guy for action-adventure soundtracks of the future.

There are some borrowed moments from other Marvel films and the climax falls into the repetitive Marvel climax template of the current Phase 2 line-up (yet another giant blue-glowing thing in the sky and stuff just flies everywhere) but this film transcends all that with some really inventive action sequences, amazingly clever visuals and the one thing this climax does that every other Marvel film has failed to do in the past, is make you shed a tear.

Girls will giggle and laugh at Baymax, the lovable inflatable robot, whilst boys will be wide-eyed with all the cool future-tech and the adults that come along for the ride will just love it.

Big Hero 6 gets Four and a half out of five robot-fist-bumps.

DUMB & DUMBER TO: SPOILER-FREE MINI-REVIEW:

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The silence is deafening, and not just any silence, the clichéd silence that comes complete with chirping crickets just to emphasise just how unfunny Dumb and Dumber To really is.

The original came out in 1994, that's right, 1994 - man I feel old. They waited 20 years to make this sequel and unfortunately this seems par for the course for 2015 with new
Terminator, Jurassic Park and Mad Max sequels all on their way just to name a few. Dumb and Dumber To is an example of one that should have just been left alone.

The dense duo go on a road trip to find the long-lost daughter of Jeff Daniel's character Harry in order to get a kidney transplant because he is dying. Well he says he's dying, for a character who requires a new kidney he shows none of the symptoms, problems or typical dramas that would be associated with such an issue.

One big thing that's missing from the sequel is the charm. Granted Jeff Daniels does bring some charm to his portrayal of the dim-witted Harry, but what the hell happened to Jim Carrey's Lloyd?! His character is so selfish and arbitrarily mean that there's little to no redeeming features for his character. At least in the original there was some sweet innocence to the character, now, he's just a borderline c*nt.

The film itself is just not funny, you can see a joke is being made, a very puerile and immature joke, but they just don't land. They are either predictable or rehashed from the original, almost as if the writers were hoping that everyone had forgotten all the original jokes after 20 years.

The interesting thing is that last year, Jim Carrey went to great lengths to distance himself from his role in Kick Ass 2 before it's release. After seeing this I don't understand why he didn't do the same thing here.

The film itself feels uneven on almost every level. From the casting, to the acting, to the set-design, to most importantly the story. The film never seems to have an even or consistent run. Ultimately this film feels like a really bad fan-fiction script that somehow managed to get made into a film starring the original cast.

For a film that stars one of the biggest comedic names of the last 20 years, and being directed by the same guys who put him up there in the first place you would honestly expect some laughs. Not silence, disturbing, awkward silence.

One out of Five poorly written pieces of fan-fiction.

THE INTERVIEW: SPOILER-FREE MINI-REVIEW:

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This is a film that should have been released as a silly little film starring those two guys from Pineapple Express doing what they do in every other film and then disappeared from our memories forever. Unfortunately, though, that is not what happened. In an unprecedented moment in cinematic history, this film will live on in infamy for a hacking scandal and bomb threats on cinemas in the U.S.A., as a result there was a huge amount of hype and expectation that came with the films eventual release. Regardless on where you stand on the hacking, bomb-threats and censorship ultimately this film is not worth all the sh*t that came along with it. 



James Franco and Seth Rogen reunite for another ‘Bromance’ tale with all the things you have come to expect from this duo in their films. This time Franco plays a dim-witted TV news host who normally focuses on celebrity-based news stories who somehow manages to score an interview with Kim Jong-un (played by Randall Parks.) Once the interview is organised both Franco and his loyal TV producer-buddy Rogen are approached by the CIA, and are tasked with the mission of assassinating Kim Jong-un. As I have already said, Rogen and Franco bring us all the things that you have come to expect from them in previous films, however after several films of essentially doing the same thing, it is starting to get real f#%king tiring. 



Before we begin with the more obvious problems in this film, I think a good comparison, controversy-wise, is Kevin Smith’s 1999 film Dogma. Dogma was judged as being anti-Christian and anti-Catholic long before the actual release by a very vocal group of people who had not actually seen the film. Had these people taken the time to see the film first they would have seen, as Kevin Smith himself said, that it was just a big dumb movie with a poop-monster. The Interview is the same, but worse than Dogma, this is just a dumb movie that would have been significantly improved with the appearance of a poop-monster. It is an uneven movie with lots of attempts at jokes, with very few actually being funny, Franco’s character is annoying, but not in the good way, you seriously want to punch him in the face. The violence in the film comes out of nowhere and feels very out of place in relation to everything else that has come before it. 



There are some good points, not many but some. There is a funny interview featuring Eminem at the very beginning of the movie, it was surprising and you got a few laughs out of this even though some of it feels forced. One other good point is the performance of Randall Park as the real-life dictator; this dull film does actually start to come to life once he is on screen. He provides some real layers to the character; at times, you really sympathise with Kim Jong-un and can almost be forgiven for liking him, and when Park brings anger to the character, it feels authentic. Randall Park is probably the guy I feel the most sorry for, because this performance should have been in a much better film. 



The film ultimately has Rogen and Franco doing the same thing they do in every movie: party-sequence, butt-jokes, quick flashes of graphic violence, bros fight, annoying Rogen-laugh, bros back together again, repeat cycle. Many of the jokes fall incredibly flat and any realism is lost within the film based on the sheer stupidity of the North Korean army and security that “Frogen” (I just “Brangelina’d’ the two of them) deal with throughout the film. Once again, the violence suddenly becomes extremely graphic and really adds nothing to the film besides shock-value and a really poor ‘Lord of the Rings’ joke that is built up for most of the film only to land with a groan. 



The film does have some charm to carry it, but that charm has been wearing thin for quite some time. Essentially this is a dumb-movie that has only a few funny moments. Is it funny enough to warrant the hacking of so much private information and the risk of danger when visiting the sanctuary of a cinema? No. 



The Interview gets two stars forced reluctantly up Seth Rogen’s ass.

TRANSFORMERS: AGE OF EXTINCTION: SPOILER-FILLED DVD-REVIEW:

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Finally sat down and watched this film, I'd like to say it was against my will, but the truth is I was looking for a reason to get angry.

This is our worst nightmare come to life: Michael Bay unleashed! Michael Bay completely and utterly unrestrained from his previous limitations and amplifying all his worst qualities: ridiculous product-placement, overly-complicated shots, and people running through unrealistic explosions but now with unashamed desire to appeal to the Chinese market.

Yes the fourth film in the series was released earlier this year and became the highest grossing movie in the world for the calendar year, earning over $1 billion and making Michael Bay and giant robots that beat the sh*t out of each other officially critic-proof. It was panned by critics the world over, even more so than ‘Revenge of the Fallen’, and it seems that audiences just piled into cinemas to see it regardless.

Apparently this film is supposed to be a reboot, however they’ve kept the same director and they spend their time referring to the previous films - so I don’t know how it’s really a reboot. Sure they’ve got rid of all of the original annoying cast, but they’ve just replaced them with an equally annoying cast. We have a forgettable main cast and Mark Walberg, don’t get me wrong, I like Mark Walberg but not when he’s the lead in a film, he has yet to prove that he’s a memorable lead in a movie. If you need evidence just compare his roles in ‘The Happening‘ and ‘Shooter‘ to his roles in ‘The Departed‘ and ‘Three Kings’ - the guy tends to work better in ensembles, with ‘The Fighter’ probably being he only exception.

Touted by Bay as being more serious in tone and less jokey you can’t help but feel like he’s telling a flat out lie when you see the large array of supporting cast there solely for comic relief. On top of this everything in this film demonstrates that nothing has be learnt from the pervious films as we are fed the exact same movie all over again but in different locations this time.

The series now sink to new horrendous lows when it comes to objectifying women, or in this case an underage girl, they seriously stop the movie to discuss statutory rape laws in favour of having sex with minors. As a father, if I found out my daughter was sleeping with a guy who carries a laminated ‘get out of rape free‘ card in his wallet, I believe that is justification to murder the little prick. I’m also surprised that the scene doesn’t cut away to Michael Bay smoking a cigar and drinking a brandy just to camera and say “You’re welcome men of America.”

You know what, let’s skip the formalities and just be honest about this film:

It's the same goddamn storyline every time: the Decepticons require some kind of MacGuffin, the Autobots want to stop the Decepticons from getting/using said MacGuffin. In the climax the MacGuffin is entrusted to the human characters that you couldn't give two sh*ts about to transport and explosions ensue!! Every f#%king time!!

And this time they don't even care enough about the audience to actually finish the story. They kill the main bad guy and then stand there saying that they have saved the day when there's a big fucking spaceship floating over China filled with an army of killer robots!! I mean what the actual f#%k?!

Narrative means jack-sh*t in this film, and I mean serious jack-sh*t. At the beginning of the film we see giant metal dinosaurs, so it's safe to assume that they are the Dinobots.... Right? Nope. As a matter of fact the Dinobots don't show up until the final 15 minutes of the film, they have nothing to do with the dinosaurs at the beginning, the dinosaurs at the beginning are never mentioned again and there's no explanation for why the Dinobots take on the form of dinosaurs. This is how little the writers and Bay cases about your intelligence as an audience!

There are so many questions this film leaves you asking that the fear of an aneurism should be at the forefront of your mind. Questions like:
- Why are the Autobots all a$$holes? Especially Optimus Prime?
- Why would humans use the head of Megatron to reverse engineer their own robots? And why would they keep at it when it kept looking like Megatron every time they tried to build it?
- Why did the annoying little robot helping the humans not warn them about all of Megatrons plans?
- Where the f#%k did all the other Autobots go when Galvatron attacks Prime?
- Why do they only show up only after they've kidnapped Prime? 
- Why does Prime need all those repairs when all it seems he needed to do was drive past another truck and he'll magically become new again?
- Why are the Dinobots allowed to roam free around China at the end of the year?

There is so much disrespect towards the audience that I’ve devised a new ratings system just for this movie:

Transformers: Age of Extinction gets 10 out of 10 venereal diseases I’d rather have than watch another Michael Bay directed Transformer sh*t-sandwich.

HORRIBLE BOSSES 2: SPOILER-FREE MINI-REVIEWS:

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With fantastic chemistry between the three leads, you can easily forgive a lot of Horrible Bosses 2’s shortcomings.

The sequel brings Dale, Kurt and Nick together again where they are starting their own business with a device called a “Shower-Buddy” or “Shower-Daddy” depending on who you ask. Through sheer naivety the guys end up in serious financial debt after doing a dodgy deal with a ruthless businessman played by Oscar-winner Christoph Waltz who takes their idea and turns it into the “Shower-Pal.” Instead of planning a murder like in the last film, they instead resort to ‘kidnaping’. Their target is Waltz’s son, played by Star Trek’s new Captain Kirk Chris Pine, who becomes more involved with the kidnapping plot than any of them expected.

The best thing about this film is the three main characters. The banter between Jason Bateman, Jason Sudeikis and Charlie Day is what made the first film such a hit and once again, this is the sequel’s strongest selling point. There are so many laugh out loud moments that just occur between the three of these guys arguing and debating each other that this film probably could survive being just two hours of these guys interacting without any plot. Kevin Spacey returns briefly as Bateman’s old boss and Jennifer Aniston makes another appearance as the scene-stealing nymphomaniac dentist hell-bent on banging every man within a 50-mile radius with a heartbeat. Chris Pine proves to have much better comedic appeal than he displayed in films like ‘This Is War’.

The film does have some drawbacks: some jokes either fall flat or become annoying, and they do a series of things that they don’t really develop - whether this is to serve as filler to get the film up to its 108 minute running time or whether they cut a whole bunch of stuff out we don’t know yet. Christoph Waltz is completely underused in this film to the point that his casting seems completely unnecessary with respects to utilizing his talents. Any other age-appropriate actor could have played this role without it feeling like stunt casting.  

Another drawback is the rut that Jason Bateman seems to have found himself in, he plays the same character in every film: the everyman with the world on his shoulders and a sarcastic wit to match every situation. There’s nothing wrong with this but it does start to feel a bit ‘samey‘, even in his other film venture from earlier this year, ‘Bad Words‘ he may have been playing against character but he still ended up being Michael Bluth by the time the end credit rolls. In the same breath, Charlie Day could be accused of the same thing however he just has a frenetic energy that’s makes his performance more unpredictable than Bateman’s.

Overall this is essentially a dumb-buddy comedy that relies on the charm of its’ three leads and those scene-stealing moments from Jennifer Aniston. You’ll get quite a few laughs but this is probably best suited to a “Tight-Ass Tuesday.”

Three out of Five wishes that Jennifer Aniston would do more roles like this. 

GUARDIANS OF THE GALAXY: SPOILER-FREE DVD-REVIEW

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It was Marvel’s riskiest film to date and it paid off big time. It became the highest grossing domestic film of the Summer and has rekindled our love of music from the seventies and eighties and baby dancing trees.

Guardians of the Galaxy takes us to the stars in a universe far away from The Avengers but still feeling very familiar. A group of "losers" must band together to save the galaxy from an Avatard on steroids and too much eye make-up who has plans to destroy the peaceful world of Xander for some reason that is not completely clear and then the rest of the universe, you know, just because.

After some really clunky, yet very important, exposition we are treated to some great visual designs with regards to aliens, planets and spaceships, along with some great casting choices for the entire main cast. Chris Pratt is going to be a huge star after this and with Jurassic World hitting next year, he is going to be an Indiana Jones-level star. One casting concern was professional wrestler Dave Bautista who was not the train wreck many were expecting; as a matter of fact he has some of the funniest lines in the movie.

The film does have lots of humour, some that was incredibly risqué like the ‘Jackson Pollock’s reference’ and most of the actors have great comedic timing, however, the film is not really as funny as it like’s to think it is. Sometimes the humour is to the detriment of the narrative and it often feels like some of the funny scenes have been edited for a half-second longer than they need to be. Some jokes were too obvious and other times I could see that it was a joke but not worth laughing at.

The soundtrack is a really defining feature of this film, and that's not something you can say about any other comic book film, my apologies to all the Prince fans that really loved the Batman soundtrack but seriously, does 'Bat-Dance' really hold up today? The great thing about the GOTG soundtrack is how it is interwoven into the film's narrative and a driving force for Chris Pratt's character.

The climax of the film feels like many of Marvel’s recent efforts. It almost feels like Marvel are using the same template for all their films: something dangerous/ominous floating in the sky whilst a dog-fight occurs, chaotically edited battles with action that is sometimes hard to decipher, and main characters surviving insurmountable odds even when debris, explosions, lasers, or intergalactic super-gems capable of destroying the very fabric of reality are in play. 

Another one of Marvel’s issues rears its ugly head again in this film with Marvel once again under-writing and under-using their villain. Ronan The Accuser was cool and had some good moments but he was no more developed than Malekeith in Thor 2. It really does feel that unless your character’s name is Loki, Marvel are afraid to create a villainous character that can detract any attention from the heroes.

Fingers crossed Avengers: Age of Ultron brings a little something different to the big final battle and the development of their villain. 

Overall, this film has achieved what The Avengers was able to achieve without five films prior to set up the story and that truly needs to be acknowledged despite all else. A really really good film, but just not on the same level as Marvel's best films.

Three Stars (from a galaxy far far away)