Set and filmed down in Margaret River, the movie cuts up the narrative to show you a the events of a series of forgettable double-crossing Aussies and a British hit-man, played by ‘Shaun of the Dead’s Simon Pegg. How forgettable are they? Well it stars that guy from the ‘300‘ sequel, that girl who was in zombie-flick ‘Warm Bodies’, that dodgy-guy from ‘Underbelly‘, that guy from ‘Cocktail‘ that wasn’t Tom Cruise and also starring Thor’s other other brother, Dwarf Hemsworth. Each actor plays a very one dimensional character with a dark side and no clear motivation other than ‘we’re just bad people.’
The shots of Margaret River are quite beautiful and that’s where the compliments for this film end. It’s just so fucking boring, I can see it’s trying to be interesting with its dutch tilts, non-linear narrative and crime-world themes but amidst all its desire to be an Australian Tarantino film it’s forgotten the one key element that makes Tarantino’s films so engaging: interesting characters. This film takes no time to establish who the characters are and what makes them tick, we just move from one action to another without feeling invested in any characters. And of course let’s not forget the other cardinal sin of this film: having Simon Pegg and doing nothing with him. This could have been a great role for him but he comes off as so bland that they could have given the role to anyone else.
But the flaws of this film extend beyond just the film itself, this is yet another Australian film that sought out star power, got it but then didn’t capitalise on it. Last year, ‘Son of a Gun‘ gave us Ewan McGregor, a movie filmed in Perth but when the premiere arrived Ewan McGregor was nowhere to be seen. Sure he gave a few shout-outs via Twitter when filming here but then did little to no promotional work during the film’s release. Simon Pegg has done a little more promotional work and interviews for this film but let’s be honest, how many people actually knew that this film was coming out? As an industry, Australian film companies need to lock down overseas talent to ensure that they are there for the promotional push of these films if they ever want to get the traction they need to succeed.
Overall, this film really needs to find its own identity instead of borrowing so heavily from others and focus a lot less on style and more on characters if it wants to be memorable. See it if you must, but I’m sure there are better things you could be doing with your life: watching your toenails grow, getting a tooth removed, licking the inside of an ashtray.
Kill Me Three Times gets Half a Star out of Five (or 90 minutes of your life wasted)
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